Closing a Chapter

We are given only as much as we can handle…so we are told. But what does this mean? There are single moms, with 5 kids while working 2 jobs…making it look easy. While there are double income no kids who have the world against them. How is this so? Is it a perception of self and circumstance? Is it a combination of inherited and societal beliefs? We could spend hours debating the answer to this…instead let us focus on the remedy.

This past week has been difficult for many, while some keep on with their daily lives. Some lives stop for a moment of reflection, while the others are at light speeds ahead of the rest. Neither is right or wrong, but different circumstances or different chapters within each life.

Upon facing my own inner dilemmas, I come to a closing of sorts…of yet another chapter within my book of life.  Though I thought the lesson was to be short and sweet…the universe called an audible, challenging me to see how well I have learned this previous lesson.

Have you ever experienced a moment when you thought you have overcome an idea or dilemma, only to have the forces of nature hit you with everything it has?! This was one of those moments.

These are those defining moments where we take a deep breath (maybe counting to 10), pausing for deeper reflection without any rapid response. We take a breath and contemplate what the other was thinking. Maybe we have a better understanding or maybe we do not?! If we do…great! If we do not, we can make effort to defuse the situation or we can forgive the person causing chaos.

It is my experience that often times people have the best of intentions, but often see how things should pan out differently. Differing from our own ideas, we are faced with letting go more control of the situation. We may feel like a ghost, as if nobody sees us…never asking for our input. Does this matter? Do they have to get our input? Maybe they do if EGO demands that others respect our thoughts.

Now we are getting somewhere. Is it demanding respect of others or is it merely asking for common courtesy? Is common courtesy lost in this world today? I am not certain of the latter, but surely we could use a bit more of it.

Stepping into the Canvas Closing a Chapter, turning the page…another begins. How we react to the previous chapter leads into the next. If we embrace our chapter story as it unfolds, with enthusiasm for the coming chapter…we surely shan’t be disappointed.

~Ani Po

Closing a chapter

No More No Mas Noogise

With cycles in our lives, it is pretty certain we question the days or events as such. We learn and we grow, coming to a place of “Now what?” hearing ancient wisdom…chop wood, carry water.

But what about when things do not go as planned or the world around us is falling apart. Whether those around us acting in accordance to their own trained beliefs or harboring negativity and spreading it wherever they go, we have the ability to stop it dead in its tracks.

A few years back, while meditating, I came up with a song about letting go. I cannot find that song anywhere, therefore I know it is not time for it to be shared. However the message was this…when we walk in spirit…no more, no mas noogise (no geese). Meaning we no longer have to listen to the nay sayers around, we simply choose to follow our path. Accepting our path, we are surely on our way.

This cycle returns to me as well. Not as often as once before but still surfaces from time to time. A place of knowing and tolerance for others, but no longer listening to the negativity that comes forth. It is my choice to paint a positive day and the colors are mine to choose as well.

Stepping into the Canvas stating no more, no mas, noogise. It is my choice to move forward, my choice to allow, my choice to just be. For on this day it is my intent to move forward in joy and laughter, brushing away heavy burdens of the past or mending open wounds…it is my choice….Ani Po


Deeper into the Canvas

Was recently at a ceremony where they invited me to go deeper within. Not knowing what I would find, but certain something still remained in my subconscious…triggers still for me to confront…or shall I say accept.

Acceptance brings a sense of forgiveness or allowing of sorts for thoughts to come and go, while confrontation brings more anger…increasing triggers within us…remaining stuck in the confines of our own psyche.

Thinking I was “good” and there wasn’t anything left for me to uncover…pop…something surfaces, bringing laughter to my being. I laugh now, for I know that all the triggers buried within were created by the self. For me to let them go, I needed to allow them to surface…letting them pass.

In letting them pass, I am healing the wounds left behind. Healed, I am able to accept a new possibility of thought…that of peace within, Joy without and Love all around me. Bliss is a reality and longevity of such depends on my willingness to let go of all that brings me down.

I let go.

Knowing that I am not perfect, those around me are not, I am free to be me and they are free to be he or she. In knowing of this, I am free to accept all for who they are…interacting as needed, allowing whenever possible.

We are reading this today for a reason. There is something missing maybe or there is something we seek…what is it? We have come to a place of accepting the self, whilst still reflecting back on the have-beens in our lives…shaking our heads, wondering “How did I get here?”

In awe at self and the journey to present day, we are left wondering “what next?” The bigger question that I hear is “If you could go back to the way you were, would you return?” I am pretty sure we all can answer this question with ease, but pain still remains…

Time for a big dose of laughter. Time to laugh at oneself. The moment we realize we have been living a dream and we have the ability to change this perception of such…we laugh in hysteria…wondering “why haven’t I acted upon my thoughts before?”

Simple…it wasn’t time.

It is now. If you are reading this…it is time. Time to reclaim your life, thoughts and ambition to meaning. We are here to experience, create and prosper…so why wait? Fear no longer has power over you…you are freed. Go now…

Stepping into the Canvas laughing at oneself. With laughter as our greatest of joys and acceptance for self, we know we are not perfect nor any others…but we remain accepting of all. Diving deeper within we surface to a brighter without. That which we uncover within the self, we re-discover in those around us. Wishing you a Syncrosensational day…Ani Po

laughing at oneself


Giving it all Away

standing alone

Years ago I was given a choice. Provide or give my everything to those closest to me. It was at a time when all I did was work. Managing work, properties and giving any remaining time to family. My family suffered as I was never really happy, working all the time.

So, one day, while escorting a friend on a personal retreat, I thought maybe it was time to reevaluate my time spent on this plain. Keep giving my time away to those around me and take for granted those closest to me, thinking they will understand. I was wrong.

During my friends retreat I was able to go inward, asking what to do. With a thunderous voice…”give it all up, focus on the home. If your home is not clear your life will continue to be a constant behind the eight ball kind of life.” Humbled by these words I fell to my knees.

It was at that moment, some twelve years ago, that I chose to give it all up. While money, power and providing for my family was important…I understood we needed very little and my time was more important. So I changed.

Not over night, but over time I sold the properties and stepped down from my managerial role, committing all my time to the kids and my beloved Cristal. The most important ones in our lives are not to be taken for granted but constantly in the center of attention in our lives.

There was a price for this. Less flow of money and less time with friends around me. Gradually friends begged me for my time and began disappearing into the sunset of time. So much guilt experienced as they requested more of my time. Then I remembered that voice telling me who needs my time for the next ten to eighteen years.

There will be kids activities, car-pooling, events that may not be my cup of tea…but to those I love, it means the world. I needed to live through their eyes and enjoyment, allowing them to shine. The caution here is giving to much of myself away, sacrificing my own personal happiness. With time I found balance.

No longer going out for beers or tearing up the town, I found solitude in quiet time. Recharging my batteries if you will, allowing more energy to those closest to me. Sadly, friends still yearn for my time. I can only hope for their understanding and my commitment fully to family and with any luck they will do the same…worrying less about ‘going out.”

While going out is very healthy for us, it is the conversation that follows which can make or break our downtime. If we go out to just cut loose, are we really getting to the core of our tension? If we go out to have a deeper conversation, discussing possible changes in our own selves…then to me is meaningful downtime. My humble opinion of course…and that is what worked for me. May be different for others.

So I reevaluate once again at the choices I have made, coming to a similar conclusion some twelve years ago…I made the right choice and I am right where I need to be.

Stepping into the Canvas with greater purpose…for I am giving it all away. Freely giving of self, allowing others to find their course, sharing in Love and happiness. For my reality is personal and others are their own, painting my own they are painting theirs. Wishing you a Syncrosensational day…Ani Po

Stepping beyond the Canvas


Stepping beyond the canvas is about seeing Life as something far greater than our conditioned lives and making appropriate shifts to align ourselves with a higher power…one of Love. We were taught happiness comes from going to school, establishing a career and living the American Dream by purchasing our own home. While achieving all of this something still remains missing. What is this void we all yearn to fill? It is the void of Truth. The void of Truth is the empty feeling we have when we continually seek more of something that gives us a false sense of goodness.

We get a house, a couple of cars and maybe some nice little toys.  We are happy for a moment, but continue to battle bouts of depression, anger, fear and sadness. Something is still missing.

The void is our lack of belonging, happiness or self-actualization of being On Purpose. We must learn to accept happiness no matter the circumstance, seeing the silver-linings in every cloud. Finding a sense of belonging, even when we do not…that is the struggle. Continually trying to fit in, with a delusion that our happiness is found there. The secret is…we all belong and our happiness comes with a mere choice. When we arrive at a level of pure happiness, we arrive at the level of Love. At this level…All Things are Possible.

“Never look up to the people who have the painted-perfect lives, because try as they might, can never see beyond the canvas.” Moira Hallsom

It is possible to have it all:  the big house, loving family, more money than we know what to do with, but meaningless without finding happiness. People try to buy happiness, but  walking in flesh focuses on meeting the lower of Maslows Hierarchy of needs…physical pleasures. While walking in Spirit, our focus elevates to higher needs of self-actualization…find Happiness, enjoying all that life has to offer. Once established, we can co-create the life we want.

What matter is seeing beyond the delusion, without taking necessary steps towards our happiness?~Ani Po

Dare to Step Into the Canvas today, living the life meant to…taking an active role in creation. You are a co-creator of this beautiful place…you are the master of your Canvas.

Stepping into the Canvas we admire the beauty God has painted, accepting it for what it is while co-creating a painting to our desires. Stepping Beyond the Canvas shedding light to painted pictures and their imperfections, then applying a higher power of Love. When we see the canvas for what it truly is we accept it as imperfectly perfect, enjoying the beauty that life has to offer. Focus on our own Canvas, Painting that which we most desire.

eagle soaring

Learning to Fly

Ever wonder what it would be like to fly?  Do you ever just sit and watch Geese fly overhead? There is much wisdom learned from these feathered friends. For one they unite no matter what. No judgment, no excuses…just unity. Next they look to share space with other geese, allowing them to lead the way or drift behind. Milton Olson does a nice job explaining these lessons…

Lessons from Geese by 

As each bird flaps its’ wings, it creates an “uplift” for the bird following.  By flying in a “V” formation, the whole flock adds 71 % greater flying range than if the bird flew alone.

Lesson:  People who share a common direction and sense of community can get where they are going quicker and easier because they are traveling on the thrust of one another. Whenever a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the drag and resistance of trying to fly alone, and quickly gets back into formation to take advantage of the “lifting power” of the bird immediately in front.


Lesson: It pays to take turns doing the hard tasks, and sharing leadership  with people, as with geese, we are interdependent on each other. The geese in formation honk from behind to encourage those up front to keep up their speed.

Lesson: When a goose gets sick or wounded or shot down, two geese drop out of formation and follow it down to help and protect it. They stay with it until it is able to fly again or dies. Then they launch out on their own, with another formation, or catch up with the flock.


Lesson: By learning from the example of our winged guides, all of us can feel empowered to feel the strength of others moving alongside you, as their presence lends power to your wings during this journey across the sky of life. When buffeted by unexpected gusts, we can choose to find refuge in the loving shelter of co-workers, friends, family and the Holy One. We may even marvel as an otherwise difficult day passes by like a swift wind, as a kindred spirit charts a way for us through the clouds and rain ahead. If your wings begin to ache on your journey, look around for somebody else to fly at the front for a while. All of us move faster when we move together. Let your ego drop earthwards as we all soar ever higher.

When I asked my son what geese meant to him, this is what he said, ”I think of poop, green and white poop. Everywhere, having to watch my step when I am at the park.” Such wise words from our children. Lesson from my son: Step with Care.

As we learn to co-create in the Canvas of Life, we begin lifting others up while lifting ourselves to greater heights. Higher and higher we fly, only to soar like the mighty Eagle. Who we soar with is left to the self, but ‘Step with Care’ as my son states, for there will be those who try to keep us grounded. Stay with the geese…soaring and soaring to greater heights.

Stepping into the Canvas ”with Care.” As my son reminds us, we all benefit from his wisdom. When we are mindful of our actions fully in the moment, we instinctively react like that of our Brother and Sister geese. We instinctively work together, share together and extend collaboration in every aspect of our lives. As we collaborate…we become One.


Laughter is the Best Medicine


We all have moments of wanting to escape to somewhere else, in hopes of finding tranquility, but lose the battle in finding peace. Some however have found peace even during difficult times. How does one deal with their own stress? How does one deflect the misery of another?

When we have a ’bad day’ three options present:

1) stay miserable, continuing to attract more anger;

2) ignore the stressors in hopes that it will pass, potentially attracting more anger;

3) walk away, centering the self in breathing. Sounds pretty easy, but for many it is not while conditioned to remain in misery…this is their reality.

Do we have to stay in our own reality of self-inflicted misery?  What about others who create misery for us? Whether it is self-inflicted or brought on by another’s actions, we can change our response. For the self-inflicted pain we have option two or three, with the preferred method being number three. Stress implemented by actions of another can be more difficult to handle, as we are often in disbelief of their thoughtless actions…Really?!

One day, an angry person, creating friction when he speaks, quickly changed the tone of our day. From happy and joyful, to painful and miserable. All staff members were affected by this mans actions and all wanted nothing to do with him. Knowing that he was hurting, while dealing with his Cancer diagnosis, something had to be done.

With a preconceived notion of ignoring the person on the next day, he came to me and apologized. In this case I chose option two and briefly ignored him, in hopes that it will pass…phew! I was thankful to have not spoken about his actions, as he came to a realization on his own…offering an apology. Next time I will be better at dealing with another person’s anger. Lesson learned! What if he had not apologized? By my ignoring him further, this would only create more tension between us. By not apologizing to me, two options then present: let it go or tell him how I felt. Thankfully he apologized and we didn’t have to cross that road.

The gentleman was ’tired’ of going through Radiation Treatments. As many patients experience fear of their last treatments and the unknown, they express fear in their own way. His was through anger.

Remaining calm and instilling peace as a common ground, I established a new reality for him. His guilt came back to haunt him. With his own self-guilt, he apologized for his behavior. Again I say…whew!

How do you handle difficult people? Is it proper to return the anger? Returning anger only creates more anger. We are not defined by our actions, but defined by how we deal with others during difficult times. These are opportunities to shine brighter than ever before!

While the Pilgrim takes things personally reacting from anger, only finding more anger. The Warrior allows others to express their emotions without absorption of anger, remaining in harmony with himself and the collective whole.~Ani Po

Stepping into the canvas identifying many colors of the rainbow, we have the ability to avoid misery brought out by a storm. Remaining calm we find ourselves instinctively wanting to dance in the rain

laughter 2

Learning to Laugh

In a world of deadlines, expectations, and increased responsibilities, we find it more difficult to find humor in our daily lives. This is the story for many, not for all, daily routines with added stress. This past week the teacher became the student.

Often times the universe will throw signs our way, in hopes of us taking time to lighten up. Learning this first hand, I realize victim mentality only adds more stress of daily living. With added stress at work, my responsibilities increasing, and needs of my children being first priority, the universe sends opportunities to identify things weighing me down…I must let go of the anger and misery of others.

Not until something so innocent happened, did internal restructuring to take place. My personal inventory became clear when a close friend reminded me for three days, ”life is a playground and we are to play whenever possible.” I will admit that at first I ignored the signs, as most humans do, until a recent post brought the attention to my actions.

With a recent post to another friend, who needed prayers sent for immediate healing in his life, the humor found itself back into my life. Instead of posting ”sending healing thoughts your way,” my auto-fill replaced ’thoughts’ with ’tights.’ Nothing like sending some ”healing tights your way.” The humor became evident with other responses, ”I’ll take control top,” ”everyone needs a good pair of tights, please send me a pair,” or my favorite ”I am going to a class reunion this weekend and need a good pair of suck me ups immediately.” I hope that all found humor in it and humor found its way into their busy days, relaxing them but for a moment.

Sometimes the best medicine is learning to laugh at oneself.~Ani Po

Do you ever feel overwhelmed with work? Life? Do you ever feel hopeless and not sure of what to do? What I found worked…sending an accidental message, taking on a whole other meaning…bringing humor to our day. Dare to be spontaneous! Dare to make an accidental message and allowing it to play through.

It is crucial in our busy days to find time to laugh. Life is truly too short to do anything other and in my everyday work I am reminded of this. Being a Radiation Therapist, I witness many opportunities of growth in this area. Everyday someone is dying, but it doesn’t have to be us. We can choose to live or we can choose to fall victim to our daily lives.

Fall nine times, get up ten.” Japanese Proverb

Stepping into the Canvas today, find time to laugh. With father time keeping track of our numbered days we may not see tomorrow.  Would we rather finish our last day on a low note or would we rather finish it on a high?  Try a little laughter today…it is just what the Doctor ordered…


A Thousand Faces

Sorting through a thousand faces that I see;

Not sure whether it is you or me.

Behind the masks and disguise;

Hidden from thine truth recognized.

Deep within the mirror, deep within the soul;

Diving further into a greater whole.

Into the darkness or into the light;

Makes no difference no longer fright.

No matter the places that we go, where we may look;

Remains the same, perception of this book.

Like an open cover, reading the contents set forth;

Turning pages of life with directions to the north.

Our thoughts may trip us, block us, keep us in fear;

Soon to find ourselves from nowhere to now here.

I lend a hand to another, the hand reaches back for mine;

What is done to another is done on time.

Letting go of my own;

Accepting a higher perspective.

No longer afraid;

No longer objective.

It just is;

It is so.

Stepping into the Canvas with a bit of rhythm in our step. No matter the pace, no matter the direction…we are free to roam where our hearts take us so. Just for today step out of a comfort zone, step out into the unknown…be fearless, be inspired…to go where you have never before…Ani Po

rhythm in our step