After eighteen motor vehicle accidents, two motorcycle accidents, three bicycle versus automobile accidents, four instances of hanging from a roof for dear life, one instance of sliding under a moving car, one bear encounter, two bull shark encounters, and over eighty-four broken bones, I finally noticed that maybe it was time to change my ways.

Some would say that I was clumsy or that a black cloud followed me wherever I went. The latter of the two is more accurate but who do you think created that black cloud? It was my self-sabotage creating my misery. While I have heard that thoughts are influenced by past traumas in life, the easiest answer is this…I attached negative emotions to everything around me and created more misery in my life. As soon as I chose happiness, all was good.

At the time of awakening seeing only the positive in all things, as if I could see the silver-lining in every cloud. While the hallucinations have subsided, paradise is still a reality. What did I do? Did I change anything? Merely my thoughts. My thoughts controlled everything: my personal life, my Love life, my reality. When I chose happiness my life did somersaults…for the better.

Making the choice to stand firmly in what I believe to be true was not easy. When first declaring my coming out, not what you think, people challenged me daily in hopes of breaking my spirits. We will touch on this subject another day, as it is one of the major sins written…damning another’s spirit. It was as if satin himself came to challenge me…”through HIM all things are possible”…true strength arose.

While my physical pain subsided the mental anguish often returns.  Yet, as I uncover more shadows of my past, reminded of the pain once endured I become healed. These attached emotions of associated pain only created more pain. Once I uncover them, I quickly ask for forgiveness or allow forgiveness to embrace the pain. Through acceptance of pain I Am healed. Yes, even pain of the past can make us strong…ultimately who we are today. Imagine…would we be who we are today without the lessons of yesterday?

Right on time, the book is delivered!

As I began unraveling my hidden emotions, a book suggested by a wise teacher shows up to teach me how to release my hidden emotions, finding health, Love and happiness. While these are merely a choice, we can still miss the mark if we have hidden emotions associated with pain. “The Emotion Code” by Dr. Bradley Nelson, explains that many of our negative traits are associated with negative emotions caused by past traumas, whether mental or physical.

While I am still putting the pieces together, Humpty Dumpty falls one last time. Broken only in mental discomfort, he quickly climbs back atop the wall. The pain has gone, but occasional mental pain arises. Allowing it into the Canvas, I quickly paint a brighter scene. The beauty of having been broken? I Am healed. Through good or bad situations we  grow. Sometimes are greatest teachers comes from times of darkness.

Stepping into the Canvas releasing old thoughts and pain, discovering a new fresh outlook on life. While the canvas may have painted grey and blacks yesterday, it is sure to have splatter of brighter colors today.  Each new day is an opportunity to discover yet another area of canvas that needs brightening…